You know, it ain't easy being a wooden crocodile. Oh sure, you get polished and shit. You get prime placement on top of a storage heater in a tastefully decorated front room. Yeh, you get all that. But where's the respect?
Talking of respect... do you know I was an "exhibit", a "product" if you will (can you imagine) on eBay recently? I know. Flipping unbelieveable. You know the worst part? I didn't sell. The indignity.
Check it out. It makes me feel ill:
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=160585830157&ssPageName=STRK:MEUSX:IT
Suffice it to say that 99p wasn't a serious price. I mean... just take a look at my goddamn woodgrain. Sweet, or what?
Well. I will be blogging until the end of June about my life, my loves... OK, my life. Ok, my woodenness. Whatever. But come the end of June, you could be bidding for a reptilian legend.
Come on sweethearts... don't make me deathroll your ass...
Love
Carl
No comments:
Post a Comment