Carl's "staycation"

I thought this "staycation" lark was going to be rubbish, but actually been quite good fun!

Even though it was supposed to be a kind of holiday, I found myself being really busy.  I've been on three different excursions and I have to say, while the The Keeper wasn't as creative as I wanted him to be, I found all three trips out to be lots of fun!

Yes, imagine that!  Me.  Having fun!  Well, imagine no more, for I had it aplenty!

The first trip was to the zoo!  Oh, yes.  You read that right!  The ZOO!  It was awesome.  OK, so it wasn't the kind of zoo that has crocodiles (obviously, a zoo with crocodiles is the best kind of zoo, in my opinion) but there were plenty of other animals that satisfied my interest.

Kudus not to be confused with kudos.
Kudus are a kind of antelope and tastier!
[Photo: Jack Gilbert]

Mainly they satisfied the part of my interest controlled by my stomach (antelope, hogs and other specimens you may find loitering carelessly on the shore of a certain crocodile's favourite watering-hole...), but there were others that satisfied my wider appreciation of the animal kingdom.

The predators.

To be fair it was a really, really hot day (The Keeper scored extra kudos points for that) and they weren't looking their most predatory.  Even so, I could appreciate their power and why they occupy places towards the top of the food chain.  Got to respect them, even though they're just big cats!

Even though they're just big cats,
you have to respect tigers.
[Photo: Jack Gilbert]

As if that wasn't a big enough surprise, The Keeper then took me to the beach a couple of days later!  I can't remember the last time I saw the sea (actually, I can. It was when The Keeper whisked me away to Scotland two years ago - hint, hint Keeper...).

OK, so it wasn't the South of France, or somewhere fancy, but it was good to bask in the blistering heat (yet more kudos points for The Keeper) on the shore of a large body of water again, even if that water was a little bit on the salty side for my liking.  Despite that I was disappointed when it was time to go home (mainly because there were some delicious-looking twerpy puppies heading our way).

A Carl's-eye view of The White
Cliffs of Dover...I've only got little legs!
[Photo: Jack Gilbert]

And today, I've just got back from a long walk.  Well, The Keeper did all the walking.  We went to see the legendary White Cliffs of Dover!  Usually, I see them in pictures and it's from out at sea, so it was a little different (not to mention a little weird) seeing them from the top.  I must confess that being up so high did unsettle me.  Not much unsettles me, and I hate to admit it, but it appears that really big heights do.  It's not natural for a crocodile to be up so high, so it must be something in our genes that does it.

I think I'll have to work on getting used to heights.  It didn't seem to bother the hundreds of other people who were walking along the cliffs.  Some of them were little children and twerpy puppies!  I can't have them strolling around along cliff tops all bolshy and happy while I'm looking all nervous and anxious.  That just won't do!

So, that's my first "staycation" over.  I still can't bring myself to write the word without the quotes, but at least the idea isn't quite as abhorrent to me now as it was.  So it was rather good and I enjoyed it.  I won't be so anxious about the next one, but I would prefer a proper holiday somewhere far away (Hint, hint Keeper...).

Oh, I've changed.  I never would have said that before this week...

Oh well, back to normality this week.  Whatever that is!

Carl is back!

It probably seems to you like ages since I posted anything.  That's the problem with you humans, always thinking about things like time and what you do with it and where it goes.  I'm a crocodile and we can lie in wait for a very long time for a juicy piece of prey to come along.  We have to wait until the moment is right to pounce and drag our dinner-to-be into the depths, then we have to wedge it under a log or something and wait longer still for it to rot a little at the bottom of the river before we actually eat it (and you thought it waiting three minutes for your microwave meal was a long time...).

So you see for a crocodile time is just not worth marking.

Anyway, I'm back.  And with a new keeper.  Don't ask what happened to the last two.  It's a desperate tail that may take some time for me to get over.  Maybe I'll blog about it when it's not so fresh and painful (and I run out of interesting stuff to tell you).  However, this new keeper has promised to look after me properly - although I'm not entirely sure he realises what that will actually entail.  Poor, foolish human...

I have to say though he's made a promising start because the first thing he did was that he whisked me away on an exotic holiday.  OK, so it was an exotic holiday to Scotland, but trust me, when you've been stuck on an office partition for the last three years anywhere is exotic!

And I saw it all! Lochs, stock and barrel.  The lochs especially were really cool.  I'm a crocodile.  Lurking like a bored log in a river, lake, loch - whatever - that's my thing.  It's what I live to do.  So you can imagine my excitement when I saw how many lochs there are!

Me on holiday - see how chilled I am?
(source: my new keeper)

That's me by one in the picture. Look at all that lovely water.  It's a big loch.  Stretches as far as my crocodile eyes could see.  OK, it's a salt water loch and I'm a fresh water crocodile but it's been so long since I've seen water I don't care.  It's wet and wavy.  That's all that matters.  But see, I'm hiding in the grass.  Just like the old days.  I've not lost my touch.

Oh and I guess those mountains are cool too.  If you like that sort of land-based frippery.

But the point is I'm relaxing.  See how chilled I look there?  Yes, I know I'm cold-blooded and chilled is my natural state when the sun's not out, but there I'm intentionally chilling.  I'm content and stress-free.  I've not really been that relaxed before and it was quite a revelation.  And it didn't happen just the once either.

You can't see the cowardly birds hiding on the rock - but I can
(source: my new keeper again)

See, that's me beside the sea.  Yes, more salt water, I know.  My new keeper doesn't seem to understand yet that I'm a freshwater crocodile but I'm working on that.  He's new and has much to learn about crocodiles.  But can you see how relaxed I am there too?  It's mainly because I'm imaging eating one of those cowardly birds who spent the whole time hiding out on that rock, even so I'm a happy snapper there.

I've been told holidays are stressful, costly and leave you more tired needing time to recover.  Well not this one. This one was truly refreshing and invigorating.  I feel more energised and ready to face the world again.

And I want to go back to Scotland.  Yes, I very definitely want to go back, just as soon as I can convince my new keeper to take me back.  All those lovely lochs to explore!  Thousands of them!  Hopefully even some freshwater lochs this time.  How brilliant is that?  Apparently I've got a distant relation living up there too.  A very distant relation - Loch Ness is a long way away - and she is very old...

But that's for later.  Right now I'm back home and ready to face the world again!  Now where shall I go for my next holiday...?

Carl