Carl's "staycation"

I thought this "staycation" lark was going to be rubbish, but actually been quite good fun!

Even though it was supposed to be a kind of holiday, I found myself being really busy.  I've been on three different excursions and I have to say, while the The Keeper wasn't as creative as I wanted him to be, I found all three trips out to be lots of fun!

Yes, imagine that!  Me.  Having fun!  Well, imagine no more, for I had it aplenty!

The first trip was to the zoo!  Oh, yes.  You read that right!  The ZOO!  It was awesome.  OK, so it wasn't the kind of zoo that has crocodiles (obviously, a zoo with crocodiles is the best kind of zoo, in my opinion) but there were plenty of other animals that satisfied my interest.

Kudus not to be confused with kudos.
Kudus are a kind of antelope and tastier!
[Photo: Jack Gilbert]

Mainly they satisfied the part of my interest controlled by my stomach (antelope, hogs and other specimens you may find loitering carelessly on the shore of a certain crocodile's favourite watering-hole...), but there were others that satisfied my wider appreciation of the animal kingdom.

The predators.

To be fair it was a really, really hot day (The Keeper scored extra kudos points for that) and they weren't looking their most predatory.  Even so, I could appreciate their power and why they occupy places towards the top of the food chain.  Got to respect them, even though they're just big cats!

Even though they're just big cats,
you have to respect tigers.
[Photo: Jack Gilbert]

As if that wasn't a big enough surprise, The Keeper then took me to the beach a couple of days later!  I can't remember the last time I saw the sea (actually, I can. It was when The Keeper whisked me away to Scotland two years ago - hint, hint Keeper...).

OK, so it wasn't the South of France, or somewhere fancy, but it was good to bask in the blistering heat (yet more kudos points for The Keeper) on the shore of a large body of water again, even if that water was a little bit on the salty side for my liking.  Despite that I was disappointed when it was time to go home (mainly because there were some delicious-looking twerpy puppies heading our way).

A Carl's-eye view of The White
Cliffs of Dover...I've only got little legs!
[Photo: Jack Gilbert]

And today, I've just got back from a long walk.  Well, The Keeper did all the walking.  We went to see the legendary White Cliffs of Dover!  Usually, I see them in pictures and it's from out at sea, so it was a little different (not to mention a little weird) seeing them from the top.  I must confess that being up so high did unsettle me.  Not much unsettles me, and I hate to admit it, but it appears that really big heights do.  It's not natural for a crocodile to be up so high, so it must be something in our genes that does it.

I think I'll have to work on getting used to heights.  It didn't seem to bother the hundreds of other people who were walking along the cliffs.  Some of them were little children and twerpy puppies!  I can't have them strolling around along cliff tops all bolshy and happy while I'm looking all nervous and anxious.  That just won't do!

So, that's my first "staycation" over.  I still can't bring myself to write the word without the quotes, but at least the idea isn't quite as abhorrent to me now as it was.  So it was rather good and I enjoyed it.  I won't be so anxious about the next one, but I would prefer a proper holiday somewhere far away (Hint, hint Keeper...).

Oh, I've changed.  I never would have said that before this week...

Oh well, back to normality this week.  Whatever that is!

Carl has a really long weekend

I'm on holiday!  Isn't that great?

The answer is "no".  It is not great.  When The Keeper told me that I didn't have to work for a week, I got really excited (although to be fair, that may have been the sun yesterday that did that).  I thought I was in for a week of sun, soggy shallows, slow food (fast food tends get away) in an exotic place far from home.  What do I get?  A cold, grey Bank Holiday at home with His Boringness.  It's not exactly what I call an action holiday.

And it's not just the Bank Holiday I'm getting.  Oh, no! I've been given the whole week off!  Surely, the ultimate "long weekend"?  Well, yes, you think so, wouldn't you?

"Where are you going, Carl?" I hear you ask (Go on.  Say it.  Out loud.  I dare you.  I don't care where you are.  Just say it.  Even if you're with people. They won't mind.  Did you say it?  Did you?  I bet you did... Let me know if you did).

Basking in the sun.  Somewhere hot (for a change).
[Photo: Jack Gilbert]

Perhaps you're thinking The Keeper's taking me to the Florida Everglades to see some distant relatives.  Or maybe somewhere hot like the South of France, or the Canary Islands?

Nowhere!  That's where I'm going!  Nowhere!  We're staying right here!  No sun, no soggy shallows, no food - fast, or slow - nowhere new and exciting, no nothing!  The Keeper calls it a "staycation".  I'm sure that's not even a real word and he should be ashamed of even thinking of using it.  The cheapskate is staying at home and he's making me stay here too.  Thanks a bunch, Keeper!  I can't contain my complete lack of excitement at going nowhere and seeing his fizzog every day for the next six days.

He could have at least waited until we had some sunshine.  It's a Bank Holiday, for crying out loud!  Does he really expect the British weather to give up its well established millennia-old pattern and actually give us some sun this week?  We had our one day of sunshine yesterday.  I knew it couldn't last.  Why do I let myself get so excited?  I should have known.

All I can say is, The Keeper had better be blooming creative with some day trips out this week if he wants to get back into my good books.

Oh, I've just checked online and apparently "staycation" is a word (because, as we all know, the Internet is always right).  OK, The Keeper can have that one.  I suppose he can't be wrong all of the time.

Wish me luck.  This could be the longest weekend ever.

I'm going to unpack my jumpers again...