Tuesday, 7 June 2011

Carl appreciates fine art

THE ERUPTION...
(JMW Turner)
Art is a made-up thing.  And as we have already established (e.g. see May 31 blog), made-up things are pretty much exclusively human.  If a croc tried making something up he or she (see my fact below) would be laughed out of the swamp.  And that's the best-case scenario.

That doesn't mean we can't be learned about it.  Art.  Today, my keeper placed a couple of pictures in my line of vision.  To be honest, it makes a welcome change from the telly.

On the left, is "The Eruption of the Soufriere Mountains in the Island of St. Vincent".  Being a croc, I would prefer a snappier title. But, I like it.  It brings to mind the brutal volcanism of the Eocene, when crocs first hit the scene.  I like the flamey bit best.  And the painter didn't even see the eruption.  Mostly made-up, it was.

OK, time for a factual interlude.  Can't de doing with wall-to-wall made-up stuff.

Carl's Croco-fact #5

Whether a croc is a cow or a bull, depends on the temperature of the egg.  It's not genetic.  31.6 C gets a bull... anything else and you got a cow.  Basically.  Wild, huh?

THE VENUS OF URBINO
(Tiziano Veccellio)

Now, I'm a bull croc, right?  Yeh, I got needs, if you know what I mean.  But when the Keeper put "The Venus of Urbino" in front of me, I didn't know what to think.  Now, it's a well-known fact that human cows are the ugliest in the animal kingdom.  If you don't believe me, check out the picture (right).  See what I mean?  No scales; no pointy teeth; no bulging gizzard...  Minging.

There's nothing like seeing a scaley cow waddle bow-legged from the swamp, dripping with mud.  Ahem.  Calm down, Carl.

So this second picture was a bit of a challenge.  But you know what?  I like it, too.  Oh, she may not be a looker (my Keeper disagrees), but she knows how to bask.  That's a classic croc trait.  And you can't quite see in the pic, but she got her dinner stored at the foot of her basking spot.  It's a puppy (see June 3 blog).  Case she wants a snack, like.  That's the Crocodile-theoretic interpretation, at least.

Anyway.  I hope you enjoyed the pics.

Ciao


Carl

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